Old Geezers Out to Lunch

Old Geezers Out to Lunch
The Geezers Emeritus through history: The Mathematician™, Dr. Golf™, The Professor™, and Mercurious™

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Mad Marvin, Episode 2

It's with some trepidation that I allow another short piece by Mad Marvin to see the light of day. He was mightily impressed by the fact that his earlier piece got a fair number of responses, and I fear his submissions to will become increasingly insistent and vile and threatening unless every so often we vent the steam cooker that is his brain. This piece is one of the less inflammatory among the two dozen or so he's submitted to date.  And we now feel obliged to begin running the following disclaimer:  "the views expressed here are those of the contributor, and do not reflect the beliefs, policies or recommendations of the management."   —the editor


I'm Mad Marvin, dammit.

The problem with this country is that we're too (censored) nice.

No, that's not it.  The problem is that we're phonies about being nice. As a society, we really ought to say what we think more often, and stand up and say so when the people around us full of horse (manure). As it is, too many people are living a lie, trying to act like saints when they secretly are entirely mean SOB's. This isn't fair to the genuine nice people (there are some, and I ain't one of 'em). How can we know who's really nice if everybody is pretending to be that way?

But my thoughts wander.

Last month I was down in Denver visiting my brother, and one day after the ballgame it was still really nice out so we planned to walk all the way down to the park by the capital. My brother has an old friend who hangs there.  On the way we stopped at the Yard House for a beer, and when we came out, across the street on the corner in front of the Barnes and Noble store, a nutcase was standing on a little suitcase yelling out a bunch of stuff about how God hated us all. God especially hates gay people and he also hates everybody who allows gay people to live.

Now, Denver is not Boulder, but it's still a decent enough place, and I was pretty sure that 9 out of ten people who passed by this creep must have felt a little sick about him. Yet (censored) nobody told him he was a (censored) (rectum). They all pretty much ignored him. (Feces). Since when is it a good thing to tolerate evil? Anyway, we went into Barnes & Noble to use the bathroom and buy coffee at the Starbucks inside, and when we came out, the old (rectum) was still standing on his stupid suitcase, still ranting.

We watch him for 20 minutes or so, and in all that time, the only person to throw a cup of hot coffee at him was me. Don't you think that if this dumb bastard was dowsed in scalding coffee by 30 or 40 people an hour, he'd get the message that his dumb (feces) wasn't acceptable? I really don't think tolerance is the great thing everybody thinks it is.

Like I said. We're too (censored) nice when it comes to ignoring and tolerating dumb-ass stupid (feces). If somebody is full of bull (feces) we should tell them so. And if they're truly evil, then we should scald them with hot coffee.

8 comments:

  1. I missed the connection between phony niceness and throwing hot coffee. Whoops--and the fascination to watch for twenty minutes while exhibiting said phony niceness. Other than that, carry on.

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  2. I'm assuming the bit about the scalding coffee is hyperbole, something we all engage in now and then. Otherwise, it's criminal assault. But let's go along with it for a minute........
    Why stop there? When we see someone acting in a way we don't like why not run them over with a car? Or shoot them? The first amendment says we are within our rights to verbally disagree with them, but why stop there?
    Geezers....MM sounds more like a horse's ass than than an eccentric wanna-be. But that's just me.

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  3. Oh, SFM, old buddy. I think MM is just trying to rile us all up. We can ignore him or, as I do offline, just laugh at his rants. Note: I said "at" his rants, not "with" his rants.

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    1. Got it, thanks for the reminder. This caught me at a testy moment after dealing with my brother medicos here in Seattle from the wrong side of the desk.

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    1. The street corner preacher and Mad Marvin are both eccentric and bellicose. Mad Marvin rants, but so did prophets and in his profanity he manages to get at something close to truth. The street corner preacher rants and may think he's a prophet but he's a hate monger and fills the air with poison. Any city would be a more civil place with the absence of both of them at the public square-until they learn respect.

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  5. I was impressed with the creative censuring of this tale and had no problem whatever of getting the jest of the story! Sometimes ignoring is the best policy, after all, dosing with hot coffee might lead to a lawsuit that would force Starbucks to lower their coffee's BTUs

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  6. It used to be okay to throw rotten vegetables at horrid people. I guess we can't do that anymore.

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