Reverting to form, Mercurious trounced Dr. Golf in the latter
stages of a thrilling mano y mano. Earlier, the Mathematician morphed effortlessly into his
comfort zone as the wearer of urine-yellow uniforms for the upcoming game (he surrendered first, in other words; yellow is a signal of disgrace in our world) and the Professor disproved
Thomas Wolfe, wasting no time in going home again to Loserville.
Dr. Golf shocked those in attendance by his
careless and sloppy play, allowing the deserving but less talented Mercurious to
snag yet another victory. Mercurious, well
known for his lack of self esteem in this world of gladiators, has been
documented on numerous occasions sneaking out the back door in the dead of
night to engage mere mortals in combat—thereby inflating his scoring and his ranking. This behavior has
led the Hall of Fame committee to reconsider his nomination.
In the final measure, Mercurious owes his victory not to talent but to the fact that he received undeserved reinforcement as a result of Dr. Golf’s dereliction of due care in his play.
In the final measure, Mercurious owes his victory not to talent but to the fact that he received undeserved reinforcement as a result of Dr. Golf’s dereliction of due care in his play.
Not to worry, as Dr. Golf has promised to come back rested and poised for victory and celebration in the upcoming match. For Risk fans, nothing could provide them with greater comfort and anticipation. All they can do now is wait.
Once again, I feel compelled to correct slight errors in Golf's recitation of "facts."
ReplyDeleteIn the first place, there was nothing "surprising" about Golf's defeat. He has come to regarded as second only to the Professor in his ability to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.
Second, the slanderous innuendo regarding my outside play among savages (playing other games where the Geezers are not invited) is ill conceived. This extraciriccular game play actually makes me look worse than I would otherwise, in terms of scoring.
If I played only these cretins, I would very likely be a five-star general by now, not a lowly sergeant.