Editor's note: This essay represents the first offering from a persistent wannabe Geezer who calls himself Mad Marvin. Marvin is the oldest Geezer to ever write here, and is not a member or even acquaintance of the original Geezers Emeritus. We don't even really like him. Well into his 60's, now, Mad Marvin was once an original, tie-dyed-in-the wool hippie liberal pinko of profound peace-loving sappiness. But later in life a profound cynicism overcame him, manifesting in rabidly extremist views. These days, his rants retain their liberal flavor on some occasions, though escalating to nearly anarchist levels. At other times he is unabashedly right-wing in his views. He is, in other words, quite literally schizophrenic. And off his meds.
It is likely we will print only a small fraction of the wacky diatribes he submits to us; we just don't have the energy to edit each piece in a way that makes him remotely presentable.
The last 50 years of stupid-assed US foreign policy can be symbolized by a single goddamn event that's just unfolded in Iraq.
After 20 years of US combat, supposedly aimed at freeing Iraq from tyranny and giving them the gift of democracy, the evil ISIS faction (which makes Saddam Hussein's Republican Guard look like (censored) Little Sisters of the Poor) takes a key Iraqi city. The nationalist defense force, four times larger than invaders, offers virtually no resistance, instead fleeing and abandoning a couple billion dollars worth of high-tech American guns, missiles and tanks to the invading ISIS forces.
The ISIS forces, despite their startling victory, are far from being beacons of bravery; they've now essentially hidden behind women and children, setting up headquarters in dense residential areas so that the US is hesitant to help the cowardly nationalist forces by striking back, out of fear of harming civilians. (The nationalist forces, it seems, aren't even willing to offer on-the-ground reconnaissance to help direct missile and air attacks against the evil bastards.) The homeland Iraqis, in other words, as a culture are just about as (censored) and spineless as the (censored) French people were when Hitler frowned at them in WWII.
(Censored). Will we ever, as a nation, grow tired of this pattern? Over and over and over again, from Korea to the middle east, same (censored) story. With professed noble intent, we decide to take on the evil fascist dictators and terrorists of the world, only to end up handing over incredibly dangerous tools to people who would love to shove those weapons up our United Ass. Or leave behind a landscape filled with landmines to blow little kids to bloody bits. As a nation, we're like a kindergarten teacher who, instead of cookies, hands out out sticks of dynamite and matches to a classroom of (censored) autistic 5 year olds.
Don't get me (censored) wrong, by the way. I admire the Iraqi and other Islamic immigrants to this country. They are the cream of the crop, the ones with spine and spirit. They should be given awards for escaping the in-bred (censored) hillbillies of their homeland. We should actually be embracing them and celebrating their triumph rather than mistreating them like they are extensions of their evil and cowardly (censored) acquaintances back home. If we were a little more admiring and welcoming of these folks, maybe they would be less disillusioned and less likely to learn hatred for us (and from us).
But if history shows anything, it's that we'll never learn. We (censored) get what we (censored) deserve.
Old Geezers Out to Lunch
The Geezers Emeritus through history: The Mathematician™, Dr. Golf™, The Professor™, and Mercurious™
Amen, Max. A right-wing anarchist--sounds like Edward Abbey raised from the grave.
ReplyDeleteIt isn't the autistic kids who do the most damage in this country. Take that back.
ReplyDeleteApologies from the Geezers on behalf of Mad Marvin, who never apologizes for anything, ever. We should have edited this in favor of a different metaphor, but we're simply a little bit afraid of Marvin. Had we been thinking, though, the more appropriate metaphor might have been giving dynamite to 14-year old middleschoolers already hopped up on crack.
DeleteLet me rephrase my comment: It isn't the kids who do the most damage in this country.
DeleteThank you, though, for the half-(censored) apology. It was unexpected.
Well, as a teacher at a middle school, I think the Geezer's replacement metaphor may be slightly more apropos than you think.
DeleteWell, as a teacher at a middle school, I think the Geezer's replacement metaphor may be slightly more apropos than you think.
DeleteHow many students at your middle school are crackheads, Anonymous, that makes Geezer's replacement metaphor any more appropriate?
DeleteRegardless of the number of 14-year-old crackheads in American society, I think it's a cheap shot to use kids - in general - as scapegoats or objects of misdirected ridicule when the real culprits are the dysfunctional adults who are in charge, the ones who siphon billions of dollars away from programs our society needs to feed their oil-sucking, drug-making-and-selling, power-grabbing, money-grubbing desires.
Mad Marvin's hyperbolic satire fell to the gutter, for me, when he aimed at kids. Geezer's replacement is no better. Target those who can fight back is all I'm saying.
50 years is about right, the last (censored) good thing we did was the Marshall Plan. And you are correct about Iraq being better off under that (censored) Saddam.
ReplyDeleteAnd that's exactly what we do....hand out (censored sticks of dynamite to (censored) countries that are the scum of the earth.
(censored) it. I don't know what to (censored) do either.
Saddam was a brutal dictator and a twisted, sick (censored). But he was like Tito in Yugoslavia and kept the lid on diverse factions. There was nothing wrong with taking him down, but it couid/should have been more surgical than a (censored) invasion! There were elements in the Ba'athist party who were moderates and who could have been worked with. Tariq Aziz would have been a good candidate and we could have avoided the hellish mess that exists there now. Of course the air boss of corruption and no bid government contracts that hemorrhaged Billions (censored) evil Dick Cheney would not have been able to take care of his rich, war profiteering friends! (censored-censored)
ReplyDeleteDagnab it, why can't I ever get this kind of controversy going on in the comments on my blog?
ReplyDeleteOh, that's right. I blog about cats and dogs and flowers.
I bet if you wrote like Mad Marvin, you'd have all kinds of controversy in your comments section.
DeleteAnd, truth be told, he had me in his camp up to the line about autistic kids, which not only is insulting, but didn't make his point any stronger. My opinions regarding stupid American foreign policies didn't change, just my willingness to read any further of what he wrote.
Well, my friends, I'm not sure if we'll be hearing from Mad Marvin again, or not. I was aware he'd be controversial—and trust me, this was among the milder pieces he submitted. I'm torn by this—I rather like the heated debate here—but I also don't want to offend anyone either. Future pieces will be even more heavily edited, I think, if they are published at all.
Delete----Mercurious
Well, my friends, I'm not sure if we'll be hearing from Mad Marvin again, or not. I was aware he'd be controversial—and trust me, this was among the milder pieces he submitted. I'm torn by this—I rather like the heated debate here—but I also don't want to offend anyone either. Future pieces will be even more heavily edited, I think, if they are published at all.
Delete----Mercurious
If you censor Mad Marvin, you censor all of us from saying what's on our minds.
ReplyDeleteSo I was offended by his unkindness - so what? I called him on it and stand my ground on that one sentence. One of the things I value most is freedom of speech, for Mad Marvin no less than for myself. There were so many other ways he could have made his point and gotten a laugh. He chose the low road in that sentence, and I said, "Whoa!"
Mercurious, if your comment above is the result of my attempt to tweak MM's nose in my response to Catalyst, then allow me to apologize to all for that - but only that. My words there certainly could be taken as a form of censorship (though not my intent at all. I guess I was going for the cheap laugh, too.)
If Mad Marvin continues to write, and write as he did for this piece, someone, somewhere - and not just a grandmother with an autistic grandson - is going to call him on something they find offensive. He wouldn't have it any other way. Neither would I.
I remember hearing back in the late 1960s we had soldiers training on sand. Grapevine then was pretty reliable and I was unhappy about it --buzz was, once we got into the Middle East we'd have a hard time getting out.
ReplyDelete